Bacon has earned a spot in the United States national dietary guidelines.

The previous U.S. nutritional guidelines included fruits, vegetables, dairy, grains and protein. However, efforts to meet these standards in the average American diet have failed for the past 20 years.

“Our old nutritional guidelines weren’t working,” says Dr. Ron Bikibi, director of the Nutritional Association of Dietary Science (NADS). “We’ve revamped the food groups in order for Americans to be able to meet these needs.”

Seventy-five percent of a regular diet can be filled with bacon. The other 25 percent can be whatever other foods are desired. It’s a recommendation that is both flexible and accommodating to most lifestyles.

After multiple revisions including 1992’s food pyramid and 2011’s MyPlate, nutritionists finally believe they have created attainable nutrition goals. “People just weren’t eating fruits and vegetables,” Dr. Bikibi said. “We’ve eliminated the complicated food groups and replaced them with an American staple: bacon.”

Only 20 percent of Americans met the old recommendation for fruit and vegetable intake. By replacing plant foods with bacon, it’s estimated that over 90 percent of people will be able to meet the new requirements. Nutritional researchers within NADS are already planning a celebration to commemorate the moment that Americans start following their advice.

“Eating vegetables was always a chore for me,” said super-foodie Jonathan Koffin. “Bacon is in almost everything I eat. I think it will be easy to follow the new guidelines.” Koffin constantly has had issues juggling a healthful diet. “I never knew how many servings of any food group I was eating … with the new bacon guidelines, I can easily determine my next meal.”

The new guidelines were developed by health researchers in the Department of Agriculture, based off of NADS’ evaluation of more than 5,000 focus groups. These groups were asked what their favorite foods were — bacon was the top choice among both children and adults.

A campaign is underway to help promote the new revision. Over $4 million has been allocated for advertising and educational pushes to get information out to the masses. Elementary teachers around the country are already being sent teaching materials to promote bacon consumption within their nutrition curriculum.

“Americans are used to eating this way,” Dr. Bikibi said. “Bacon is on everything, from foods like donuts to hamburgers and desserts. Just the other day, I had five servings of bacon without any effort at all … it’s already in all of my favorite foods.”

From current research, stress levels from control groups eating bacon were at an all-time low. Since diet is no longer an issue, people can now eat and drink as they please. Health specialists are optimistic that the new guidelines cater to the age of convenience that we live in. Bacon can easily be added to any food.

The new nutritional guidelines are planned to go into full effect by the end of this year.


  1. Brandon

    Ha! Now that’s a meal plan I could get used to. Thanks for the laugh. :)


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